Kenny who?

There is a line in a Kenny Chesney song that states, "...about life and love and the lack of and the emptiness in my soul..."  Well, I feel kind of sorry for that Chesney boy.  You know, at times I think about life, love, but never the lack of and never an emptiness in my soul.  My soul isn't determined by what is happening in my life (work or love).  My Joy isn't determined by what happens to me, but what Christ is doing in me and through me.  So, in all seasons give thanks.  In all trials look to the one who will pull you out.  IN EVERYTHING give thanks.  God is so good.  God is so great.  But not to say that my mind doesn't ever drift at what might be, what could be, what may never be.  In everything know the one who created you knows what's up.  He knows how to work out your life.  He knows who, what, when, where, and why things happen and don't happen.  So Mr. Chesney, with all due respect, please fill your emptiness with Jesus.  Not another song, not a temporary band aid of beer, but with the joy that will overflow to the world around you!!

times change

This thanksgiving was a little strange.  Don't get me wrong the family was there (almost all of them), the food was amazing, the fellowship was intense, and the laughs were plenty, but it was different.  I started to see how we are all changing.  How the values we were taught as a child are stronger than ever, and the importance of family has never been broken.  I noticed it most in my cousin Matt.  He is completing his first semester at ASU and being away has seemed to make him see how good his family is.  I believe this rings true for us all.  When we step out and see what others have compared to what we have, we notice how blessed we truly are.  I was thankful to see his delight and excitement of being back home.

The strange thing about today was how silent it was.  Everyone could feel the missing link.  Everyone could feel the missing hand of the patriarch that has held us together for years, but no one was willing to state the obvious.  It was weird.  Not really sure what to think of it yet.  Not really ready to accept the fact Paw Paw wasn't at the chamber, but was gone.  I love thanksgiving.  I love it the most of all the holidays.  But I don't like the reminder of the one (my best friend, hero, biggest fan, i'll give you my kidney) not there.  Christmas... I think I'll just away. I think I'll escape and start something new instead of living what was.  

purt plus

This is the season that I love but also puts me in a very reflective mode. For example: I examine my life currently compared to last year (work, relationships, joy, mistakes, successes, etc...), the possible outlook on the year to come, and what do I still want to cross off and add to my bucket list. But I will say that one of the main things that starts to hit me a little during this season is my very season of singleness. Before you think to much about that previous statement, keep reading. I love my life at this moment, I love the freedom I have, but at the same time I do wish to start sharing life. Sharing all the crazy things I do, experience, and see. There are times when I analyze the lives of my married friends and thank God for being single, but there are also times when I wish I was sharing this moment with someone other than me. So in this season of thanks I want to be thankful for the blessing of singleness, but when I see the bombardment of relationships around me it makes me wonder when my turn will come. It's as though the fact of being single is thrown in my face and beat in with a mallet. Gus says boys are stupid until they are 26. I think he's right. Daddy says I'm not dating or getting married until I'm 30. I think he's right too. Momma says one day I'll look at this season and wish it would return. I think she's right more than anyone.

music is the generation connection

Dance Off Video from Elevation Church on Vimeo.

thanksgiving thanks

I think its crazy to be thankful for a holiday about thanks, but then again I'm thankful to be thankful for this season of giving thanks!  Every year we cram into my Aunt's basement to a spread of pot luck food on a pool table.  We have conversations about what's been going on, how you been, EA football, old stories of the past, new ideas of what's to come, and laughing at Maw Maw with her cough and spray eating.  Working in a school will make one realize all they have and all they should be thankful for.  Thanksgiving is my favorite holiday simply for the fact the focus is on gathering, family, food and football.  Not presents, not hectic shopping, not trying to please everyone.  It's more or less the calm before the storm... if you know what i mean.  So, I pose the simple question... what are you thankful for?  What do you have to not be thankful for?  In everything give thanks.  Working long hours, give thanks.  Crazy kids, give thanks.  Being in overload with family, work, projects, volunteering, extra responsibility, how am I going to pay that bill... give thanks.
As I am writing this blog... i am chomping at the bit to go home.  I want to see my family so badly... and I'm thankful for that.  Granted they're in a spitting distance (a long spit)... but I'm thankful for them.

what now?

I'm a pretty patient person.  I am forgiving.  Think the best of people, but sometimes folks do me wrong.  Sometimes I trust and believe.  Sometimes I hold onto hopeful promises made.  Sometimes I believe in things that may or may not be exactly true.  Sometimes people disappoint me.  And sometimes I have to face the facts of what is, is and what ain't, ain't.  I think right now I have to hold out.  I have to wait.  Wait for age and time to change things.  Wait for life to make since.  But maybe not.  Maybe now is the time to let go and realize once again it ain't me.  It's ain't the country girl from Carolina.  It ain't the teacher.  It ain't the crazy runner who loves to do it all.  But have no fear at some point in time there will be a time when it is me.  I am the one that is ran after and desired.  Maybe not today... but someday... and all those in the past who where thought to be the hoped for will be a faint image...

talking bout my generation

This week in Health, I'm going to state the question to the students what folks are saying about our generation.  Because I don't know about you but I hear a lot of bad stuff about the kids I teach.  "this generation is lazy.  these kids don't know what work is?  these kids have no respect."
Well, I might be biting off more than I can chew God has really placed in my heart the desire and sun stand still prayer to rise of a generation of respect, honor, and value.  I see so many kids not see value in their self, causing them to not value the work the do, or the way they behave.  So, I stomp on the lies about my generation and the generation of the kids I teach.  I see a generation of potential.  A generation that is going to rise up and change the bible belt mind of "the rapture is coming there is no hope."  HUSH! It only takes a few.  It only takes some big prayers for value and against the attack of the enemy.  Don't give up on my kids, pray for them.  Don't condemn them for what they aren't, encourage them to utilize the potential with in.  Speak truth of who they are, not who the world wants them to be!  Does anyone get what I'm saying here?  I'll let you know what they say.  How they see themselves!  I think we'll all be surprised!

oh... look, that's my favorite

In Concord I believe we have just peaked our fall color beauty for this year.  All the trees are starting to look less bright and more dark but that's not the point of this blog.  I have had so many people ask me about the Beauty of Costa Rica.  The Rain forest, the flowers, the insects, the sea line, etc... and yes all aspects of Costa Rica are beautiful, but nothing is as gorgeous as fall in Carolina.
The perfect temperatures of 40, in the morning, 70 in the afternoon, no humidity, and Carolina blue skies wisped with thin white clouds would make the lonely and depressed notice.  But, I love the colors.  When driving down the road between the tree lines of orange, red, yellow, brow, green, reddish/yellow, makes me soak in the beauty of my Father.  This was no different last Thursday when I was traveling with my aunt.  Here we are leaving her house for lunch, after planting 200 tulips, when we both say, "look at the trees!"  It was crazy.  Well, I continue the convo by stating how I love the Red leaves.  How much I love seeing that one Red tree pop amongst the many Carolina Pines.  Well, travel down the road 2 more miles amongst the tree barrier of Yellow and Orange I state, "Oh these... look!!... These are my favorite."  As you can figure, there were no Reds in this bunch of trees, Red i do love, but hey Orange and Yellow I love too.  Let's go a few more miles down the road and here we are staring at a tree where you can see the leaves color progress from green to red due to the sunlight exposure.  It was amazing, and again I state... "look, that's my favorite."
After stating 3 different stages of leave changes as my favorite, my aunt karen pointed out the fact, I need to pick one, because you can only have ONE favorite... but Like a bunch! Well.... I decided to just change my statement to "oh... Look... I love leaves!"
I got to thinking more about my unable to pick a fav color of leaf delima and what the changing leaves showed... death.  There is beauty in Death.  There is beauty in every stage (color) of Death.  Often times death get's a bad rap of darkness.  And yes, when Paw Paw died, I was and continue to get sad.  Death of the patriarch, friend, and hero is hard... but there is beauty in him passing as well (that'll be another blog) but for now, well, take a look around.  Look around right now outside at the colorful tree line and tell me death is dark.  Dying is dark.  I don't know.  It kind of looks as though when something is put to Death there is beauty.  That awful secret you have put to death.  That thought from the enemy you have put to death.  The payment of your sins put to death.  The actual death you were to face before Jesus, put to death.  The one thing that you have battled with and finally won, put to death.  It's beautiful.  Put it to death!! and tell me which is your favorite...

Free WiFi

Moe's has free WiFi.  I love it but have realized that I feel very uncomfortable using free WiFi in the states.  Somehow whipping out a computer, finding an outlet to plug it in (B/C of low battery) is embarrassing for me in the states, but the same idea/concept/action is not a big deal in Costa.  How is that?  I don't know.  Any ideas?  But... as I sat in Moe's I met this really cut burrito maker named Joe (Joe that works at Moe's).  Well, Joe was very cute until I saw him walk outside with a cigarette in his mouth.  What is it that makes someone instantly ugly because of a rolled stick of burning paper infused with cancer?  I don't know... but homeboy Joe that works at Moe's just fell off the radar!
But... I will continue my Moe's Adventures... because I have coupons... and they have free internet!... that's what's up!

stateside

Well, I've concluded I am the worst stateside blogger in the world.  In an environment of everyday internet, and 24/7 power I can not write a single blog.  But put me in a country with maybe once a week internet and hardly any power and I blog the ramblings of craziness.
This just goes to show how things change when one is back on the states.  The hustle. The crazy. The race of being better... the race of making things better.  The ideas of new things, the ideas of improving old things.  You all know I teach school!  I love it.  But I want to share a secret with you all.  I don't teach school because I think education is going to change the world; I teach school in efforts to impact a generation with the love of Jesus.  Yes, education is power.  Yes education is needed to make it in the U.S, but that's not my goal.  My goal is my  Sun Stand Still Prayer... "for the power of the spirit to flow through me, to empower a generation of honor, love and respect.  For the overflow of the love of Jesus to cover each kid."
That's it.  Simple!  So, I ask for prayer.  In a season of craziness that is quickly approaching, I am asking for prayer from you, for me to keep my vision.  TO pray my Sun Stand Still prayer over me because I don't know about ya'll, but heck if I get distracted by "what I have to get done." or by that one class that's a real handful.  I'm not the point.  Jesus is the point.  Be the change the world wants to see.  So, yes I teach school.  Yes, I teach in a public school.  Yes I have friends that aren't "christians"(whoopty doo)... but how else will the dark know the light if no light goes into the dark?
I'll do better on this blog thing... I know ya'll missing my stories!!!!  I'll have to tell ya'll about my new neighbors, family stories, and failed romance.  Oh the life of Flossie... it's crazy I tell ya!