Friends

We all have them.  They people who know you the best.  The people who tell you the truth and the people who are there for you no matter what you are going through.  The ones where you don't need to say anything and feel completely comfortable, and along those lines, not speak to in forever and pick up where you left off.  They understand.  They Listen.  They comfort.  I have to say I have some good friends.  It wasn't until recently that I found out who my friends were.  You think you know who they are, but your true friends show up when you need them the most.  I have great friends.  Some of the best.  So here is to you.  Thank you!  You'll never know what you mean to me.

2 months

Its almost been 2 months since paw paw died and it still hurts.  I'm not going to fib or sugar coat it.  It hurts.  I randomly start to think about spring strawberry picking or summer corn and i start to cry.  Or I pick up the phone and Paw Paw's number is still listed.  Walk in Maw Maw's and not see him sitting in the recliner.  Or just calling the house phone and not hearing him pick up the phone as soon as I start my message and he knows its not a sales man.  It's hard.  It's still hard.  The question is when will it get easier.  I feel so silly sometimes just suddenly crying.  Out of nowhere tears flow.  Some folks don't understand.  What's wrong with you? they ask.  Why have you been crying?  Heather you should be over that by now.  Well, I'm sorry. I'm not.  Not yet.  I still get upset.  I still cry.  And I still want him back.  That's the truth.

Maw Maw's Grocery List (FYI.. She's Diabetic)

You are reading the list correctly.  The sugar free syrup is crossed out and it has been replaced with cookies.  Maw Maw goes to the beauty shop once a week and during this time Paw Paw would go to the store and get groceries.  As a little girl the list was pretty long.  Maw Maw would cook and know what she needed.  Then it got to the point where she'd say, "I don't know what to put down.. what's your momma get?"  Now it's pretty much waffles, syrup, and coffee, except for today.  She has taken the time to let it be known she wants some cookies.  This is her entire list.  SO I ask when was the last time the only thing you wanted to eat was cookies?  Umm.. when you were four or five... right? It's the circle of life my friends.  You start in diapers and you end in diapers.

His Power

I have been reading the Gospel of John this week when I read this passage yesterday and it really spoke to me... Check this out John 9: 1-3 "As Jesus was walking along, he saw a man who had been blind from birth. "Teacher" his disciples asked him, "why was this man born blind? Was it a result of his own sins or those of his parents?" Here's what Jesus has to say... "It was not because of his sins or his parents' sins. He was born blind so the power of God could be seen in him."
WHOA. When I read that I immediately thought of the trials I have had in my life. Or some things I notice that have been unfair to my loved ones or even when I wonder "why this is happening to me?" Here is my answer... so the power of God could be seen. How amazing is that? When my mind or your mind begins to wonder... Lord why did you make me this way? Why does it take me longer to understand? Why am I crippled in this area? Why ... Why... Why... Just know you are made that way purposely. The kicker is allowing His power to be seen! Accepting who you are and letting His power heal/ shine through you!
In case you are wondering... Jesus heals the man later in the chapter with spit and mud!

Feb 14th

Single Awareness Day. That's the name some people refer to as Valentines Day. There were a couple of years I identified and was well aware of my singleness. For example the long list of names called at the end of the day in high school to pick up flowers and balloons in the cafeteria. OR when you forget it's valentines day, go out to eat, notice all the couples, receive sad looks and then it hits you.... oh yeah you're sitting by yourself on Valentines Day. Those are two examples of my single awareness but the past two years have been different. Once I realized who I was in Christ and the love he has for me I don't need the approval of man's love... but yesterday was Feb 14th. I was at home with my family. I did not even realize what day it was. Sure my momma got me a valentine but the love is always there. I am always shown and given love at home. So, sure I didn't have a quote on quote Valentine, but I do have a never-ending backbone of love at home, my family!

SpUrTs

I'm not sure about the rest of ya'll but I go through spurts. Heather, what do you mean spurts? You know. Do really well at something for a while, then a distraction comes in, a change in routine, an unfortunate event takes place and suddenly everything is messed up. This happens to me spiritually. Just being honest here folks. There are times when all I want to do dig into His word, journal, stay at rest with him, then something changes and boom its as though my routine is messed up and suddenly my relationship begins to suffer. A practical example is when I was in college if I didn't run in the morning; I wouldn't run at all that day. It wasn't that I didn't have time, but it was I RUN IN THE MORNING. If it's not the morning I don't run. Sounds crazy I know... But it hit me one day... Why not run whenever? Why does it have to be the morning? OR I would think if I didn't have time to run 5 miles what is the point of running at all? Well, needless to say I came to realize even a one mile run is better than nothing. Here is my point. Things happen... life happens. God isn't up on a status quo... an all or nothing, you have to beat your record of time you spent with me and if you don't spend the same amount of time with me each day you're worthless kind of God. I think this sometimes. I think... Gosh... I am slipping because I haven't been in the word today like I was yesterday. Take every thought Captive! Where do you think those thoughts come from? If I don't have time to read the word for 30 min, but have time for 10... Read 10. I think it all comes down to desire. Your desires are what you have to be aware of. Is your desire him or something else? Yes, God gives us desires but our number one, one should be him! Yes I have spurts. When these things occur, I have to realize what is happening to cause these spurts or what is happening to cease these spurts. Do you really think God is going to punish you for not spending as much time in his word because you are serving others?

SO Long.

what comes around

Several times in my life things have happened and I didn't understand why and several times things have not happened and I didn't understand why. One of the things I have to remind myself is to trust in the one who makes and doesn't make things happen. Trust in the reality he has my best interest at hand. Rest in the knowledge the one who created me and planned out my destiny has it all under control!

changes

As life progresses change is inevitable.  In fact to say there is no change would be a change.  I like change.  I like for things to be mixed up.  For example one of the main reasons I like P90X is because the workouts constantly change and the exercises within the set workout changes as well.  Sometimes change is hard though.  For example not calling Paw Paw every Wednesday morning is hard.  Not living at home around my family is hard at times, especially when there is snow on the ground.  Our feelings change constantly.  Sometimes I feel sad, happy, hungry, silly, desperate or powerful.  I frimly believe feelings are based on a circumstance so change circumsantaces, change feelings.  Sometimes our view of people change and we do or we don't know why.  A person that was once your friend isn't or someone who you didn't care to be around is now your friend.  Sometimes change hurts people, sometimes change encourages people, sometimes change inspires people, and sometimes change discourages people.  I also believe change is something that occurs overtime due to an increase in knowledge.  What we thought we knew we didn't know.  What we didn't know we were lacking in knowing, we now know.  I hope to never get to the point where I don't want to change for the better or get stuck in my ways.  But here is my take on change, if we ever get to the point we don't accept change we will be left behind.

Foolishness

"If you aren't willing to look foolish; you are foolish."  Excerpt from: In a pit with a Lion on a Snowy Day

I read these words and they stuck with me.  How often have I missed out on doing something because I was scared of looking foolish but how foolish is that?  I have recently had an athlete not want to play in a game because she was scared of messing up.  She was scared of looking foolish.  She has missed out on some quality playing time and FUN!  When you're young there is that immediate regret over something you may have done right then.  As you get older, and granted I'm only now starting to realize this, you have more regret over the things you didn't do than the things you did do.  This applies to many areas of life.  All of this being said there is no Fear in the Lord.  The spirit of Fear is from the enemy.  Foolishness is in a matter of perspective.  Often one may look at me and think that was foolish, but that individual doesn't see the whole picture.  They don't know what I know.  The beat of a drum often times sounds different if no other instruments are being played... or can be heard along with it. 

       

Life's a Dance

I recently heard this old number one hit from I think 1992... maybe... song on the Radio and thought I would share... The good ole John Michael Montgomery song... If you wanna hear the song.. just google Life's a dance.. and listen to it on lala....

When I was fourteen I was falling fast
For a brown (I know it's supposed to be blue eyed but I always change it b/c I have brown eyes!!) eyed girl in my homeroom class
Trying to find the courage to ask her out
Was like trying to get oil from a waterspout
What she would have said I can't say
I never did ask and she moved away
But I learned something from my brown eyed girl
Sink or swim you gotta give it a whirl


Life's a dance you learn as you go
Sometimes you lead, sometimes you follow
Don't worry about what you don't know
Life's a dance you learn as you go


The longer I live the more I believe
You do have to give if you wanna recieve
There's a time to listen, a time to talk
And you might have to crawl even after you walk
Had sure things blow up in my face
Seen the longshot, win the race
Been knocked down by the slamming door
Picked myself up and came back for more


Life's a dance you learn as you go
Sometimes you lead, sometimes you follow
Don't worry about what you don't know
Life's a dance you learn as you go
Life's a dance you learn as you go
Sometimes you lead, sometimes you follow
Don't worry about what you don't know
Life's a dance you learn as you go
Life's a dance you learn as you go
Sometimes you lead, sometimes you follow
Don't worry about what you don't know
Life's a dance you learn as you go
Life's a dance
Life's a dance
Life's a dance
Take a chance on love
Life's a dance
You learn as you go