Now Driver...

I once heard, "there is rest in the knowledge of not knowing what's ahead."  Well, no offense to Cathy Bennington and her wealth of knowledge, but i do believe on any road there are sign, signals and sometimes flashing lights.  Granted, you  may be on an old country road, sandwiched between wheat fields and and cows, but even these roads let you know when a curve is coming.  So, my question is: What's on this road?  At the moment I can't see what's ahead.  I don't know what or if there is anything past the approaching hill.  All I know is I'm on it.  I have passed many green lights, seen some caution signs and now sit at a yield sign.  Yield signs are crazy.  With a yield sign you can stop or blow right through with a quick glance to make sure it's safe.  But you have to think. You have to decide what to do.  You have to keep moving regardless.  But I'm on a road where I'm the passenger.  I am not the driver.  I have to wait.  Wait... Wait... Wait...  So far, this road has been crazy.  It's been a smooth ride.  It's been surprisingly comfortable.  But what's ahead?  What has this road I've been on been preparing me for?  What has this drive taught me?  What signs have I passed?  But it's not up to me.  It's up to the driver.  I just have to know when to get out of the car.  I have to know when to speak up and direct.  I have to listen.  

"there is rest in the knowledge of not knowing what's ahead..." but don't miss the signs that prelude what may possibly come in the future.  Now Driver.... where are we going?

tears and tomatoes

This past week I was able to plant 60 of the 200 tomato plants I have to help provide fresh, local, vine ripe, organically grown tomatoes for two local restaurants.  After preparing the soil and digging my holes I stated setting out the plants in prep of planting them.  Well, that wasn't the problem.  The tears came when I knelt down, picked up the plant and placed it int the hole.  MY mind instantly flashed back to my family's patriarch kneeling in orange county clay, with his blue pants, mud covered brown brogans, thin worn out carolina blue button shirt, gently placing each tomato plant in the land that represented his entire life.  I see Paw Paw as I myself is kneeling in the dirt planting my own plants and I begin to weep.  Tears as strong and fresh as the day he died.  Tear up over the tomatoes.  Wishing he was right beside me helping me put them in the ground.  So, the first 10 plants have extra tears of love and I bet these will produce the sweetest tomatoes!   

air amount

"God is bigger than the air you breathe..."  Think about that.  The amount of air that surrounds you.  The amount of air that you take in on a daily basis.  The amount of air that is on this earth and continues to be produced by plants.  God is bigger than that!  Sometimes, I forget just how big he is.  Just how powerful he is.  Yesterday, I started to reflect on where I am.  Where I am going.  What I am doing.  What I want to be doing.  And why I'm not doing what I want or what I am supposed to be doing.  Along with this reflection I briefly started to get overwhelmed by the responsibilities, the desires, the uncertainties of what's to come.  As soon as the gasped breaths came, they fled at the calming arms of Christ.  It was as though he said, "Heather, I got you.  Don't you know how big I am?  I got you!"  I won't lie.  Sometimes I stopped and think, "Lord, Here?  Really Here?  Why not him? Will I ever be settled?"  and an array of many other thoughts.  Those thoughts... I could choose to dwell on them or I could continue to renew my mind on what is true.  What will always last.  And that is simply... God's got me. He has it all.  He has it all planned.  Rest in his arms.  Rest in his hands.  Just rest.  "Heather, I got you!"  Good to know :)          

my teaching philosophy.

Well, it's been a while since a post but let me explain the reasoning in this.  Between coaching volleyball 5 days a week, working 9 hours Saturday and Sunday waitressing, teaching 9-4 five days a week, and attempting to stay in great running shape, along with sleeping, enjoying being outside as much as possible, and trying to help with track (which hasn't happened as much as i'd like)... i really haven't had time to put thought to keyboard.  But as this Saturday afternoon is clouding up with the approaching summer thunder, I am taking time to write.  Have no fear my thoughts the past few weeks have been abundant, and many but I have one thought that has really dug deep on me the past few days.

My teaching philosophy.  It was asked of me when i interviewed for my first job and to be honest, I didn't have one.  Could I truly have my OWN philosophy without ever really having a class that I educated?  Could I really have a any idea, insight or opinion in the education system?  I think not.  But as my experience increases, my teaching philosophy is starting develop.

I have had the opportunity to teach tested subjects, along with a non tested subject in my 4 years of teaching experience.  Math is a very hard core, prove what you know on a MC, TF, or short answer pen and paper test.  Where the fun of numbers.  The fun of learning.  The fun of going to school is sucked out of the class just as the stress on the teacher is pushed in.
This past year I have been placed in a non-tested subject.  Where I have had the freedom to cover the curriculum without the added pressure of having to perform a certain way, for a certain group, on a certain portion of material.  I must add how liberating this feeling is, to be able to teach to teach and the students can learn to learn.  That's the way I started this year.  "hey kids, guess what, right now everyone has an 'A'.   How do you like that?  There will be no written test, no final exam, rather you learning.  I just want you to learn.  Learn how to take care of yourself.  your pass and fail will be the quality of life you endure.  A good grade will equal a very healthy life, a bad grade will be a very poor health, bed ridden life."
So, I've been encouraged to see my kids showing appreciation in others, respecting the staff, showing good character, talking out their problems instead of fighting, drinking white milk, eating more fruits and veggies at lunch, restating the harms of drugs, and truly applying what they learn.  So I believe teaching is when you can see the practical application of what was taught being lived through the students.  

Here's my beef because of the grief I have gotten from other teachers...So, a number on a report card is a number.  I will not have a kid make a 75 in my class because they didn't get their rules signed, or they didn't bring back a paper.  That shows nothing!  That does not accurately portray the class.  What was taught.  Really, did you teach the kids how to get a paper signed and bring it back?  I know I didn't?  If the class was on how to get paper signed by all means, take a grade on it.

Now, with that philosophy, I get judged... a lot.  Maybe it's a crazy way of thinking, but it makes since to me!  Maybe it's different from traditional school grades, but HELLO... school classes have changed, so should our grading systems and methods.

So, by all means, ridicule me for not giving a test, or a grade on a stupid paper coming back signed, and I will show you how my kids are making lifestyle changes that will make them healthy, productive, contributors to society.  No Test.  What an idea.  Let's learn!  What a better idea.  So, step out of the box and learn with me.